I get asked this frequently so I figured i'd write about it.
"How did you get in to ABDL?"
I realize it's super hard to explain because we all come by it so differently.
For me, it's tied in to a whole lot of emotional pain and trauma.
When I was born, I was born with a birth defect that wasn't detected on the ultrasound because of the way I was situated. As soon as my Mom delivered me, I was quickly taken away to be operated on.
That means those crucial first bonding moments did not happen for me. I was in an incubator and had to lie on my stomach because the incision/surgery location was on my lower back/butt area. I still sleep like this today.
Growing up was a real struggle as my Father is emotionally and verbally abusive. I have a lot of memories of laying in bed, crying, feeling so depressed and defeated. I was in the fetal position and I would close my eyes so tightly and wish I could "go back" and have a re-do.
I wished so bad I could just be a baby again and have a loving dad in my life. I would sometimes wrap my bedding around my legs to simulate the comfort of a diaper. I remember even trying to make one out of plastic and toilet paper.
Those emotions never went away and I still long for it. I realize that yeah, sometimes diapers evoke some sexual feelings -- but the basis of this for me is just an emotional need and longing to have some kind of really precious and tender romantic connection with someone who wants to be around me, inspire me, be proud of me, be encouraging and have the relationship so deeply rooted in love.
I have all the same things to give back to someone. Hopefully that kind of provides some more insight on this, if you were at all curious how it manifested.
Cherry do understand your ABDL feelings, mine stem from a longing to return to state of unconditional love that some of us have experienced. That combined with a deep desire to undo all society's expectations of what it means to be a man. Throw off all the anger and rage of daily life.
I truly hope you find the ABDL Daddy your looking for and that it gives you joy.
|13 days ago|